Life has become just a hummm....

        I wish I had told her sooner. Never knew time would literally fall through my fingers like sand. I just wanted her to know that I cared for her. She kept on asking what was my problem. I was just too shy to tell her it was her only. Well, she was not the problem but you know, when a girl starts coming to your mind much too often, how does everything goes.



        She always thought she was imperfect. I kept reminding her that to be loved, one doesn't need to be perfect. love itself is about accepting one's imperfections. In any case, I considered her perfect. I liked everything in her. Also told her many times. She just showed gratitude. Not that I wanted anything more then. And now I regret thinking like that.

        I was surprised and relieved nobody noticed an edge to my reaction. It has been hard for me to heal after X. Now it seems am not made for love at all.
"God, if u have any reason left for me to live, this would be the best time to show me"

        Seeing them together was like a thousand needles piercing through my body each second. It was totally blank until I realized that the bike is vibrating violently, and I came to my sensing after reading the speed. I had made a new time record. I have never felt so miserable ever before. Not even home looks a safe sanctuary.

        I thought I would cry. But never in my life have I felt so strong as to stop tears before they overflow my eyes. I feel like hurting somebody or breaking something. I have never experienced this degree of depression, never been this much out of control.

I just need to talk to somebody.....